Hanoi, Hanoi
A wonderful place to hash
We have great fun
Dodging the shit and trash

Our skies are always clear
And we have ice cold beer
So come along,
And sing this song,
On the wonderful Hanoi Hash

He’s the meanest

He sucks the horse’s penis

He’s the meanest

He’s the horse’s arse

Ever since he found it

He’s the meanest

Why was he born so beautiful,
Why was he born at all.
He’s no fucking use to anyone,
He’s no fucking use at all.
He might be a joy to his mother,
But he’s a pain in the asshole to me!

Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee
For cunt, for cunt, for country and my queen
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
Drink it down, down, down, down…

She’s all right, she’s all right,
She’s little bit flat-chested, but she’s all right

Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home; 
Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home. 
I looked over Jordan, 
And what did I see, 
Comin’ for to carry me home, 
A band of angels comin’ after me, 
Comin’ for to carry me home. 
Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home; 
Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home. 
If you get there before I do, 
Comin’ for to carry me home, 
Tell all my friends I’m comin’ too, 
Comin’ for to carry me home. 
Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home; 
Swing low, sweet chariot, 
Comin’ for to carry me home. 
Sometimes I’m up, sometimes I’m down 
Comin’ for to carry me home 
But still my soul feels heavenly bound 
Comin’ for to carry me home 
Swing low, sweet chariot 
Comin’ for to carry me home 
Swing low, sweet chariot 
Comin’ for to carry me home.
MONDAY IS A WANKING DAY
Song:
Today is Monday,
Monday is a wanking day.

CHORUS:
Leader: Is everybody Happi?
All: You bet your ass we are!
Da da dut da da, da da dut da da

Today is Tuesday,
Tuesday is a two finger day.

Today is Wednesday,
Wednesday is a hummmmer day,

Today is Thursday,
Thursday is a drinking day,

Today is Friday,
Friday is a fucking day,

Today is Saturday,
Saturday is a hashing day,

Today is Sunday,
Sunday is a day or rest.

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SONG BOOK





WELCOME VIRGINS  Tune: Frere Jacques

We’ve got virgins (We’ve got virgins)

At our Hash (At our Hash)

Gonna get ‘em drunked up (Gonna get ‘em drunked up)

Down-Down-Down (Down-Down-Down)



CLOSING SONG:  SWING LOW Tune:  Swing Low, Sweet Chariot

I looked over Jordan and what did I see?

Coming for to carry me home

A band of angels coming after me

Coming for to carry me home



CHORUS: Swing low, sweet chariot

Coming for to carry me home

Swing low, sweet chariot

Coming for to carry me home



I’m sometimes up and sometimes down

Coming for to carry me home

But still my soul feels heavenly bound

Coming for to carry me home 



If you get there before I do

Coming for to carry me home

Tell all my friends that I’m coming too

Coming for to carry me home



YOU’RE A SH*TTY HARE Tune:  Living on a Prayer

You should have used more flour and chalk

We followed your marks but they said ‘You’ve been effed’

It sucked, you suck



We wanted to drink Magic Hat

But lost on your trail we would settle for Pabst

It sucked, you suck



You’ve got to hold on to the drink you’ve got

It doesn’t make a difference if it’s beer or a shot

This is for the checks you forgot on trail

You’re drinking a lot

Woooha there was no beer out there

Wooooo you’re a shitty hare

Take some flour and use it out there

Wooooo you’re a sh*tty hare

You’re a shi*ty hare!
YOGI BEAR Tune:  Camptown Races

I know a bear that you don’t know,
Yogi, Yogi,

I know a bear that  you don’t know,

Yogi, Yogi Bear.

Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi, Yogi Bear.

I know a bear that you don’t know,

Yogi, Yogi Bear.
Yogi has a girl friend, Susie, Susie

Yogi has a girl friend, Susie, Susie Bear…etc.
Susie’s into lingerie, Teddy, Teddy

Susie’s into lingerie, Teddy, Teddy Bear….etc.
DOWN-DOWN:  BRITISH

Here’s to _____, he’s true blue.

He’s a hasher through and through,

He’s a pisspot so they say.

He tried to get to heaven,

But he went the other way.

Drinking down, down, down down,

Down, down, down, down, down,

Down, down, down, down, down
DOWN-DOWN:  Flintstones Tune:  Meet the Flinstones

Hashers, the Hashers, he’s the bigest wank in history,

From the, town of Northboro,

He’s the leader of debauchery,

Half-mind, trailing shiggy through the years,

Watch him, as he drinks a lot of beers,

Down-down, down-down-down-down, etc. 
WHAT A WANK Tune: William Tell Overture

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,

What a waaaaank, what a wank, wank, wank. 
DOUGH RAY ME:  Tune: Do, Re, Mi

Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,

Ray, the guy who serves me beer,

Me, the guy who drinks me beer,

Far, a long long way for beer.

So, I think I’ll have a beer, L

a la la la la la beer!

Tea, no thanks I’ll have a beer,

And that brings us back to

Beer, beer, beer, beer. 
USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO

I used to work in Chicago, In an old department store,

I used to work in Chicago, I don’t work there anymore.

A woman came in for a hammer,

A hammer from the the store, A hammer she wanted,

Nailed she got!

I don’t work there anymore.

DAYS OF THE WEEK (Call and Response)

Today is Monday!

Monday is a wanking day.

Is everybody happy?

You bet your ass we are! 

Today is Tuesday! Tuesday is two finger day…

Is Everybody Happy? You bet your ass we are.   (etc., etc. as below)

Wednesday is a hmmmmmmm day…

Thursday is a drinking day…

Friday is a fudge day…

Saturday is a hashing day…

Sunday is a day of rest, because…

Hashing consists mostly of running, drinking, and SINGING.  The songs are designed to offend the easily offended, and delight the easily amused.  There are many, many, stupid hash songs.  Here is a teensy minority of them.  Join the HanoiH3 to hear a performance

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